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Sunday, January 20, 2008

Roy Haynes - he's no Don Rickles!

Gawd, I am so pissed.

I went to a jazz concert last night and it turned into a poor man's Don Rickles performance.

Roy Haynes - legendary Jazz drummer was in town. He must be close to 100 years old. Anyway, what little there was, was very good. I really enjoyed it. I clapped at what I thought were appropriate moments, and with great enthusiasm at others.


I didn't pay $25 (plus making arrangements for someone to watch my kid) to listen to Mr. Haynes insult me and the rest of the audience because:

1. He didn't think we whooped and hollered enough (like those brain dead folks in Santa Barbara the night before - they whoop and holler at anything - I used to live in that area);

2. He didn't like the stage lighting - hey man, get there ahead of time and check it out before the show starts, it ain't my fault - I had nothing to do with it.

3. He didn't like the drum kit - hey - the AUDIENCE didn't provide the drums. If you didn't like the drums, then you should have brought your own!

4. He was pissed cause he was missing the Roy Jones/Felix Trinidad fight. Geez - those two guys were BOTH washed up 10 years ago, besides, why was it OUR fault that he had to miss the fight? WE didn't schedule this gig!

5. And then he starts insulting Bakersfield! Hey, I don't come into your home and insult it. I once was at a concert where the band was similarly rude to the audience. Unlike this Saturday night, the audience voiced its displeasure. One of the band members sneered out, "You don't get many bands to come back again, do you?" We replied, "Only when we ask them to come back!"

If anyone should have been pissed off, it was us! He started 30 minutes late, played for less than an hour, and never did do the final number because he got pissed that we didn't kiss his ass enough during his performance. And then we gotta sit there and listen to him insult us.
Hey, if I wanted to pay to be insulted, I'd go to Vegas and catch Don Rickles. What's your problem man?